A Dixie Carpetbagger

Scene: gun store interior, three men visible.  Two are behind the counter, working on rifles, while one is poring over the holster rack directly opposite.

Gun Dude 1: Wow, we have a Norinco AND a Polytech in stock!

Gun Dude 2: You should buy both of them, add to your dream gun collection.

GD1: (Snort) I don’t want the original, much less Asian knockoffs.

GD2: Well, you could always build a semi-auto .45-70, take it bear hunting…  (chuckles)

GD1: If I go bear hunting, I want something more substantial than a .45-70.

GD2: Like a Tomahawk cruise missile?

GD1: Yeah.

(Conversation turns to a female customer who hunts grizzlies in Alaska with a .300 Win Mag.)

GD2: Yeah, I think a .300 Win Mag is about the bear minimum…

Dixie: (Groans, puts face in hands.)

GD2: Hey, I had to do it.

GD1: Man, my kids would’ve loved that one…

And yes, I did pick up a new holster.  Add in the new camera I just got in, and I’ll finally be able to complete the task I’ve been tagged to do since… 19 July.

First, it was the grackles, then the turkeys, and now the emus have been co-opted by the terrorists.

The article is funny on one point, though: “Emus, they said, are fragile and can overheat easily, and they feared scaring the animal could cause it to run and injure itself further.”  Fragile, my hind leg– the ones we used to have reminded me of the raptors from Jurassic Park.  (Clever girl…)

Of course, Jay has to ask “But the real question is, of course: What caliber for emu?”  I’ve heard that a hot .38 Special (158 grain +P) double tap does the trick, but those birds were standing still…  Personally, I say modern terror birds require at least a 12 gauge pump.

Mmm, bacon.  Via Tam, who wants to try her hand at it.  I’m just glad that I don’t have to deal with porkers around here.  (“No wild boar around here,” said I.  “That’s good…” said the neighbor.  “Yep, the panthers, bears and bobcats take care of them,” said I.)

Pig hunting has three simple rules.  One, bring enough gun.  Two, bring enough people.  Three, keep a tree  in sight.

You don’t have to outrun the pig… just the slowest guy you’re hunting with…

Robb got an email from the owner of Ghillie Suit Resource and decided to pass on the word.  Seeing as I’ve come very close to ordering some of their products (curse my lack of spare time to use them), I’ve decided to spread the word, too.

One of the commenters at Robb’s pointed out an unusual use of Ghillie suits.  Very cool.  Not the music… the suits.

Side note: the name of this post comes from a Call Of Duty 4 level, which involves a crazy Scottish SAS Captain, one of the most engaging game experiences ever designed, and extensive use of your ghillie suit.

Since I built my AR, I’ve fallen in love with the platform.  To the extent that I’ve made the decision to replace my Remington 700/ Leupold VX-I platform with a dedicated AR (I have a spare lower already.)  My only question is caliber.  The 700 is in .270 Winchester, and I want something with close to that same power.

I had (kinda) ruled out the 6.8 SPC, but it seems that it has a proven track record.  So my options are: 6.8 SPC (.277, same as a .270), .30 Remington AR (more energy, but DPMS and Remington don’t seem to be selling uppers separate yet), the .25 WSSM (at least it’s a Winchester…), or the .450 Bushmaster (recoil heavy, and I don’t really need that much energy.)

So, considering the cost of the ammo and the upper, any thoughts or recommendations?

Why is it that every time I have a .22, I need a shotgun, and vice versa?  It’s like the squirrels know what I have, and know how to get out of range…

It might be time to buy a Judge.  Won’t be a 12 gauge, but I’ll have flexibility.  Because if I don’t ease the squirrel problem around here, they’ll be in the house with me.

“Something uttered a deep throated growl at me. A warning. This was not some cute woodland creature from a television cartoon. The stench of something primordial was in the air, more than blood, less than my suddenly dry mouth, and I knew that I had somehow in that moment slipped a rung on the food chain.”

- Brigid

Been there– nothing stirs the old blood like realizing that something large, furry and ill-tempered stands between you and home.  My equipment shed stands about 100 yards from my house, on the northern face of a hill.  In the winter time, it gets dark quickly in the little grove of trees that surround the shed.  More than once I’ve been working on a mower or tractor at night and looked out the shed door to see multiple pairs of eyes.  Not the low to the ground eyes that signal a rabbit or armadillo, but the eyes that signal a coyote.  Needless to say, this provided a great incentive to quit working on equipment at night.

In addition to the coyotes (two groups, about 6-8 members in each), my area is home to at least two bobcats (possibly three, I think it’s two males with bordering territory and a younger female), a group of red wolves (less than a half dozen members), a pair of red foxes, a pair of gray foxes, and the kicker– a pair of Florida panthers.  Nothing says “stay inside the rest of the week” like hearing the scream of a female panther looking for a mate.

Squirrels. Rats with a sense of fashion. Will eat just about anything, from pumpkins to electrical wiring to small birds. They breed like their cousins, the rabbits, and are sneaky. The best solution is prevention– do unto them before they do unto you. Bonus points for methods that either induce laughter or a healthy desire to call the guys in white coats. And now, for the Twirl-A-Squirrel.

A new domestic terrorist faction has been spotted in a New Jersey suburb.  Officials say that the faction, Al-Cluck-Purr, is responsible for at least one strained tendon and one woman running into traffic screaming like a sissy.

New Jersey police say that members of this group are easily identified, as they are less than two feet tall, covered in feathers, and are made of lean sandwich meat.  We were told that this group poses no harm to anyone who is not a lifelong New Jersey resident.  Police state that under no circumstances are civilians to attempt to hun… er, apprehend these violent extremists.

For commentary on this event, we know turn you over to Uncle, who has the latest.

Because this skill would make my life so much easier. No more missing, no more “hunting.” Just walk up to them, and gather my venison… tasty, tasty venison. But no, I have to actually track mine down.  (sigh)