A Dixie Carpetbagger » Cars

The flat tire blues

Dixie — Mon, 17 May 2010 19:00:20 +0000

Sorry for the lack of writing, my schedule has (once again) been wrecked. Had to change a tire on one of the vehicles, and that ate up some time. I hope (and pray) I never get a flat on the road, because there’s no way I’ll ever get it changed before starvation sets in.

I’m being dead serious here– I had to break out a “cheater bar” (length of metal pipe) and a mallet (8 pounds of hand-crafted oak) to break the lug nuts free… good luck doing that with just the little tire tool the manufacturer provides. I now know why my dad always complained about pneumatic tire tools in the hands of novices, and I have now joined in the chorus.*

The there’s the jack. You break the lug nuts free, jack the car up enough to get the flat off… then you have to jack the car up another 4 inches to get the spare on. This is actually as far as the jack goes, so if you parked the flat on a high spot, and the jack is in a low spot, you’ll need to dig out for the spare. Don’t ask me how I know this…

Oh, and don’t forget to block your car. With what, the manual won’t tell you. Are you supposed to cut down a tree and cut chocks? Carry bricks in the spare tire well? Use a passenger? Heck, there’s enough room in the spare tire well for a full set of four chocks… why not just include them?

If I ever get a flat on the road, I’m calling a wrecker and letting them handle it… it’ll be worth every penny.

*CLANG! CLANG! Son of a banjo picker! CLANG! Fricken’ nut! CLANG! Give a man a pneumatic tool… CLANG! … and he’ll overtighten everything! CLANG! CLANG! CLANG!

Awesome/Not so awesome

Dixie — Tue, 26 Jan 2010 23:47:05 +0000

Awesome: just made the Dean’s List. For the first semester I’ve been at my university.

Not so awesome: I’m not at class right now, because I can’t get out to the main road. Because the county decided that the hill with a small sinkhole would be an awesome place to scavenge gravel from.

Now the hill has a large sinkhole. I miss having a four wheel drive vehicle. (sigh)

“I’m from the government…”

Dixie — Fri, 08 Jan 2010 18:00:06 +0000

“… and I’m here to sink you.” Ford sales up 33%, GM sales down 6%, Chrysler down 4%. How’s that bailout workin’ for ya’, GM? Oh, and the guy now running the show (Whitacre) admits he knows nothing about cars… but he does have a history of co-operation with the government. No wonder the company’s in a death spiral.

As I’ve said before, I’ll never buy a GM vehicle again. It would have pained my dad to have seen GM in such a shape… would have hurt him even more to buy a Ford. (chuckle)

(H/T Uncle)

Automobiles

Dixie — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 19:00:59 +0000

Via Tam, a video from Kevin Baker about car safety. Go watch it, old timers… trust me, it’s revealing. What’s unnerving is that my dad had a ’57 Bel Air (4 door with the post, 283 Power Pack V6, and glass pack mufflers.) and he drove like he had stolen it.

As an example, one time (during Dad’s early years) a man came into the local diner and made the announcement that someone driving a Bel Air had been rear ended and killed, and that he thought it was Dad. One of the men spoke up and said “No way in Hell! No one’s that damn fast!”

I’ll take my Century (quit laughing!) over a deathtrap any day. Same engine as a Grand Prix, Lumina or Malibu, but with better styling, a bigger AC, and the safety of being viewed as a Granny-mobile. (By the way, she’ll beat a Grand Prix off the line and in the quarter mile. As far as to how I know this, I plead the Fifth.) Too bad I’ve sworn to never buy a Government Motors product again… looks like a Crown Vic or Town Car for me. (Time to see when the local PD has their vehicle auction…)

I still want a GSX or Invicta. They may be rolling death raps, but they’re stylish rolling death traps.