In short: I’ve come to the point where my fuse is shorter than my attention span. Every time I try to cool down, I hit another land mine of glaring stupidity.
A Whale clean up the oil spill? No, no– it doesn’t make the water 99.9985% pure! (The Gulf wasn’t that clean to begin with, nitwits!)
Large groups of people coming together to clean the shore? No, no– they’re holding “Hands Across the Sand”… apparently they think they can ward the oil off… or something. (Draw a Venn diagram consisting of three concentric circles. The first is “not-so-bright people,” the second is “leftists,” and the last is “eco-nuts.”)
The economy going down faster than Ashley Dupree when Mr. Spitzer walks in the room? Hey– it could be worse! (Don’t worry, Obama voter, it will be!)
The President doing everything shy of putting on a tricorner hat and speaking with a bad Corsican accent? Hey, at least he’s not Bush! (Yes, an Obama voter has told me this. I almost lost it.)
In short, it’s come to the point that I have to either take it easy, or go buy a horse and change my name to Quantrill. Maybe I can just do funny stories…
Linoge
8 Jul 10 at 5:42 AM
Horses are fun.
Just sayin’.
Justthisguy
13 Jul 10 at 12:26 AM
I used to have a Quantrill t-shirt. I lost it in a move. I bought it to tease the Clerk of the Atlanta Friends Meeting, who only existed because his grandmother rolled her husband up in a rug in an inverse-Cleopatra move to put him into the wagon with her furniture, when Quantrill’s men were about to burn her house down. That was when Quantrill and his guys were killing every white man and boy in Lawrence, Kansas.
Later, my faint attenuated rudimentary social sense kicked in, and I realized that would be pretty rude, and maybe even cause an octogenarian Quaker to pop me one upside the head.
Dixie
13 Jul 10 at 3:06 AM
Heh. Quantrill T-shirt… I have *got* to get me one of those…