19 April 2010
Newsflash: Gun Kills 5, Wounds 1.
San Francisco, CA
Police are searching for the perpetrator of five murders today in San Francisco. Sunday afternoon, the suspect– described as “a big, dark revolver with hands and legs”– killed five and wounded one in a random attack outside a tavern. The lone survivor is unable to remember details, but believes the revolver’s last words before shooting him were “… you’ve got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?”
The suspect is described by police as a high-capacity semi-automatic revolver, about 8 inches tall and around a foot long. If you see this suspect– or anything matching the description– please do not attempt to apprehend it, as it is very dangerous. Forward all tips and sightings to your local police department.
Well, for once, it looks like a gun DID kill someone…
