One of Tam’s comments on this thread got me to wondering… what is the taxonomy of the hippies? The best I can figure out, it looks like this:
The family Hippie is organized as follows:
- Subfamily Europanae (Old World Hippies)
- Genus Germanicus
- German Bohemian (Germanicus bohemi)
- Czech Rural Hippie (Germanicus czechi)
- French Poet (Germanicus surrendera)
- Genus Caucusus
- Russian Farm Peasant (Caucusus rodinai)
- Ukrainian Beachgoer (Caucusus nudi)
- Polish Forest Peasant (Caucusus annexi)
- Subfamily Pacificanae (Pacific Rim Hippies)
- Genus Animus
- Japanese Otaku (Animus animei)
- Korean Gamer (Animus obsessis)
- Subfamily Westernae (American hippies) *
- Genus Virginus
- Vermont Mountain Hippie (Virginus wacki)
- Massachusetts Driver (Virginus tailgatis)
- Great Lakes Leftist (Virginus snowi)
- Canadian Snowbird (Virginus ehehi)
- South Florida Retiree (Virginus pensiona)
-Genus Californicus
- Greater Campus Socialist (Californicus cannabisus) #
- Common Californian Hippie (Californicus patchouli)
- Washington Tree Hugger (Californicus loggera)
- Congressional Democrat (Californicus spendi)
Notes:
* : All American varieties of Hippie are descendants of Germanicus bohemi transplanted to the United States in the 1930′s. Unfortunately, it was unknown at the time the rapid population growth, mutational capability, and territorial spread that Germanicus bohemi was capable of.
# : Rumors of a logic-resistant semi-tame variety of cannabisus have become common in the literature. Unfortunately, it is unknown at this time whether the observed effects are indicative of a new sub-species, or are simply a byproduct of the hardiness of cannabisus.
